Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Nightmare

7:01 PM 0
Really is a creepiest nightmare ever! FML~ The night two day ago, I super tired cause after all the sport I been doing. Finally I have my sweet sleep, GUESS what I dream of!? My gosh, is HER! WTF~ do you have to appear in my dream?? It actually a sweet dream and suddenly YOU appear in my dream what the hell=="


It start with a great Dinner with Him, really sweet chat along the dinner. Suddenly SHE appear from NOWHERE and seat beside us. Can't remember the detail and don't ask me what we chat in my dream cause I dont remember. Then don't know why me and her started to argue, I don't remember why we argue. Then the argument became worse, she wanted to slap me and I wanted to slap her. He stopped us, then My phone RANG~ and I'm awake! hahahah~


Serious what a nightmare and I laugh when I woke up. Really thanks to that fella who morning called me to wake me up, if not I will continue with that STUPID dream. What a joke.


By the way, to all my friend. No worry, I'm okay and all those so-called emo song I post doesn't mean I'm emo, just I like the song. No other meaning. =)
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Wednesday, March 14, 2012

14-03-2012

7:30 PM 2
3月14日

我不会再哭,真的不会了。
可是想起你的有的没的。
还会有一点点的没心情。
一点点的伤心,一点点的舍不得。
但是这一切都会过去。

去年的今天是我们一起的日子,也是白色情人节。
我尽量的不想起你,还是会想到。
我已尽没和你联络几天,可是但你出现在我的FB或Instagram真的有冲动找你。

不知你现在怎样。
你会有活的比我好吗?
你会和我一样会想起我吗?
每次想到我们你会伤心吗?
会不舍的吗?
会内疚吗?

不知你还有把我们的照片留在皮包里没?
想我是会拿出来看看吗?
还是为了她,把照片藏起来。

不知没了我你会习惯吗?
没了我烦你,你会更开心吗?
你还是像以前将,会注意我的一举一动吗?

你应该不会记得今天吧。

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Sunday, March 11, 2012

AGAIN~

1:47 PM 0
我以为我可以用忙来麻醉自己,实事是不能。它只能帮我忘记找你忘记回你但还是不能忘记我们的全部。我以为把自己弄得越累我就不会失眠,原来这样只会帮我想起你的更多。你的影子每天都一定会出现,不管我在哪。我最不喜欢的就是明明你是在意我不找你,但是你就是要假装没事。我不找你你还是会找我看看我会不会回你。可是当我找你时你竟然讲"我要找你就会找你"。这句话真的很伤我!所以我决定我逼自己不找你不回你。我也会用回同样的那句话跟你讲"我要找你就会找"。我在很尽量的过好我的生活,过的比你好比你开心。如果你真的关心我在意我,我不介意你找我。可是如果不是就别来给我希望。我原本是你女友却被你弄到我像你外面的女人!像第三者!像个贱人!

Thought making myself busy will make me forget about you. Yes it really work but only that moment of busy, after that everything will be same. I when hill climbing again, and the scenery the sunrise make my mind clear and comfy. But after that my mood go down down again. The more tired I am the more I think of you. Like you never leave, keep on turning turning in my mind. The most I dislike is, you care about me and u care I don't even find u but u have to pretend u are not. I don't find you, you will find me. When I decide not to bother about your life, you find me. When I need you, when I need a good chat with you, the only thing you will say is "I will find you when I want too" okay that sentence really hurt you never know! That's why I just have to tell you whatever you told me before so you can feel how I really feel. I trying to get over my life really. If you really care about me please atleast do something show me that you really care about me and care about us. Know what? I'm the girlfriend in the beginning but now you make me feel like I'm the outside girl! The third party the bitch then mean one!!
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Friday, March 9, 2012

我的恶梦

1:45 AM 0
我一直都在骗自己,
骗自己我可以做到。
我可以忘了他,忘了一切。
原来我只是骗自己。
我希望这一切都是一场梦。
睡醒就没事了。
这里太多我们的回忆,
以前是我最想快回到的地方。
现在这里是我每早上
不想开眼睛看到的,
每晚上不想回到的地方
这里已变成我的恶梦。

希望你也和我一样,请别活得比我快乐比好。
请别忘了我。别对他比对我好。
请不要。
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Wednesday, March 7, 2012

You.Me

1:18 AM 0
When we can't really bare to losing, it will make us suffer. If you ask me, can I bare of losing, I can only tell you I can lose in any game but not in Love and Family. If you ask me, can I let go you? But can you ask yourself before you ask me this question? Can you let go me?! I mean for serious let go.

I really try to forget you, since the day u go back. I try really hard to ignore everything related on you. I try not to let my tears drop for you again, but still my tears just love to wash my face and love to wet my pillow every night. I hope you are the same as me. But seem like you are not, probably because the place you living don't really have thing related to us. 

I actually think and try to keep away every single thing which related you, but know what!? It just remind me that's everything on me is all belong to you or it was from you. My bag, wallet, watch, necklace and most of the thing in my room was all bought by you. Even my face washing foam set was bought by you too. If I want to forgot you there only two choice for me, 1; Throw everything in my room and keep away all the stuff u gave me. 2; Leave this room, and find a new room. Which choice do I have to choose? Can you teach me how to choose!?

I try not to think about you, but everywhere I go or everything I do all will linked to you. When I hoping to have dessert as supper no more you accompany me to Sweet Huts. When I really want to have sushi, no more you fetching me to dinner. When I'm tired just hoping to have a little fight with you but no more you. I really feel bored without you. Hope you will bored without me too.

One year wasn't short wasn't long, but for me this one year really mean many to me. Is you, who make me sad and happy at the same time, angry but still feel pampered by you at the same time. The one who teach me many thing and lead me many in my life. When there a problem or question you will be the first listener and my counselor. When I want something, you do it although u don't like it or keep saying "NO" but end up still doing so. Really miss you silly face and your very cute sleeping face. Miss how we fight for food. Miss how we always fight. Miss the time when we say each other fatty.

Know what? People say when they meet death, they will think more and more old stuff.  After we separated, all those old memories keep flowing in. Hope you still remember how we meet. all those playful moment, especially the day we crazily play and snap photo at pavilion. Still remember every night I bought you dinner. Remember what you called me and what I called you. Remember how I Love to mess with you puffy helmet hair. Remember you will disturb me even after a fight or argument with you. Still remember I messed up your surprise for me on our anniversary. Remember how lovely and playful we are before this. Snapping photo although you don't like snapping photo. Please remember and don't forget those memories. Please keep everything from me properly. Please don't lost my photo, my gift and clothes from me. One year later maybe will get it all back from you!

Hope I really can let go, and also hoping you will come back. If you not happy or suffer you can find me, as you know I always your listener. GoodBye Baby~
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